The danger of Sexting
11th July 2009 by Roscoe Holland
“The world is a dangerous place. Not because of the people who are evil; but because of the people who don't do anything about it.” Albert Einstein 1921
Sexting... what is it good for? Absolutely nothing!
I was interested to read an article in the WarCry [Vol. 128 No. 26 4 July 2009] all about "Sexting: Indecent Exposure". It was really interesting and disturbing to read about teenagers looking for recognition, relationship, attention by sending half or full naked photos of themselves to friends and sometimes strangers on their mobile phones.
"WHAT ARE THEY THINKING?" Don't they know how dangerous this is?
I know of a 14 year old who sent some suggestive photos to a boy she liked at high school. He sent them to a 19 year old friend and this guy, along with two of his buddies, found this girl and raped her on her way home one night. This girl's life is now changed forever. She has lost her innocence, her trust, her sense of worth and beauty.
I also know of some teenagers in a youth group who sent some suggestive messages and photos around their youth group. Fortunately for them they have a great youth leader and senior pastor and the issue was addressed before anything had happened.
But come on guys - we say we follow Jesus and want to save the world from sin and injustice - and then we turn around and slag off to each other on Facebook and send these "sexting" messages to each other. That's not being consistent with what we say. that's being a hypocrite.
Jesus slammed the Pharisees in his day because they were hypocrites. The story of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector is a perfect example (Luke 18:9 to 14) and in Matthew 13:27- , Jesus says "Woe to you [teachers of the law and Pharisees], you hypocrites! You look like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of dead man's bones and everything unclean." They said one thing and acted pure at church but during the week they allowed sin into their lives and lived contrary to what they professed to each other and especially to God.
Instead, scripture reminds us:
-
Romans12:21 - Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
- Proverbs 3:5&6 - Trust in the Lord with all your heart and don't rely on your own understanding and knowledge. In all your ways acknowledge Him and he will direct your path.
- 1 Timothy 4:12 - Don't let anyone look down on your because you are young, but set an example fr the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
Seriously guys, be smart and wise and to protect ourselves too. God never intended his creation to be hurt. But we allow sin into our world and into our lives and then we get hurt. If we follow God and listen to the Holy Spirit then we can be free of sin and live lives that are full of joy, love and safety/protection.
God wants you to love him with everything you have.
God wants you to be safe and free from sin.
God wants you to be honest and pure people.
God wants you to show others his love and protection too.
It's really not hard to do that - it just takes practice and obedience.
Ciao for now... Roscoe
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Comments
"She has lost her innocence, her trust, her sense of worth and beauty all because she tried sexting."
No, she lost those things because a man raped her. I agree the girl should not have engaged in sexting, but her actions did not cause her rape - the rapist did.
I agree with Allie. The story you relayed about the girl being tracked down is tragic, but sounds to me like an exceptional circumstance. But in the case of a rape, it is NEVER the victims fault.
And I think it's a tad simplistic to say that "If we simply follow God and listen to the Holy Spirit then we can be free of sin and live lives that are full of joy, love and safety."
I understand the biblical basis behind the idea that when we sin we step out of God's will, but it sounds to me like you're implying that when we sin, we're asking for trouble, but if we behave, we'll be safe and happy.
Where's the grace in that?
If you've made the mistake of sexting (and it is a mistake), don't despair. Talk to God about it. And then go to your youth leader or a mature christian you trust and talk it through. There's forgiveness and hope available through Jesus, no questions asked!
i also agree with allie, rape is NEVER the victims fault!
I'm really glad to see that people read what I write... and I thank you for your honest comments...
May I have the right of response to a few comments here:
I agree rape is never the victims fault either. There are however precautions we can take to protect ourselves.
In the case I stated in my blog, the young girl was not worried about protecting her purity and sexuality.
No, it was not her fault and I'm sorry if you thought I implied that. What happened to her is tragic.
I was trying to say we need to protect ourlseves.
Mel stated that it might sound simplistic that "If we simply follow God and listen to the Holy Spirit then we can be free of sin and live lives that are full of joy, love and safety."
Unfortunatley, in my life before officership I worked with young people up at Kings Cross and Surrey Hills in Sydney and experienced people living life far from the will of God. And since becomning an officer I have continued to live and work with people of all ages, and I know of teenagers and adults who sometimes need simplistic instruction until they can work out how to make those good choices for themselves.
Sometimes a straightfoward, simplistic approach is what people need.
I also wrote, "She has lost her innocence, her trust, her sense of worth and beauty all because she tried sexting".
YOU coose where you put yourself and you also choose what risks you expose yourself to. If more people thought before they acted then we would live in a safer evironment.
I ache for this particualr young girl as I know her, but I still believe her choices could have been better and who knows, if she was honouring God with her life then this event may had never happened.
No one knows what will happen tomorrow, except God. And I maintian that if we are following God's direction (keeping in God's will) then he will endeavour to keep us safe and free from sin.
I'm happy to discuss this further if anyone wants to and I expected this subject would cause question - that's the purpose for these blogs...
You can contact me at North NSW Headquarters on 02 6771 1632... Roscoe
Hey Roscoe,
Got a few questions I'd love to hear your thoughts on! =)
While I agree that God's ideal plan was for us to live in a perfect (and therefore 'safe') world, we know in our current world that being a Christian doesn't necessarily make us safe.
For the last 2,000 years Christians have been persecuted, tortured, imprisoned, and even killed for their faith.
But beyond that, there are also plenty of people with a really strong Christian faith who have died from cancer, or from car accidents, or in wars. I remember one story of a young Christian guy who recently drowned while surfing at the beach.
So can you help us understand what you mean when you say "if we are following God's direction (keeping in God's will) then he will endeavour to keep us safe?" Do you have any Bible verses you can share with us? How would you explain really tragic things that happen to commited followers of Jesus?
Looking forward to hearing your response =)
Hey jarrod, there is a verse in the bible that says,
The name of the Lord is a strong tower and the rigteous run into it and they are safe.
You know i dont believe that this safety neccisarly comes in this world, but if we live in the will of God then we know that our eternity is safe.
We can be safe, thats why people had the balls to live raw and passionate and unafraid, because they knew that living and walking with God meant they were going to be safe, and they were going to be alright!
Sometimes the world sucks and Christians die and people die, but what about the times when the world sucks and you come home on your knees and call out to God and realise that 'i am safe'
Safety doesnt always come from nothing bad happening to us, safety comes from sitting in the arms of a God who loves and cares for us and knows our future and thinking 'everything is going to be ok'
God is good, why because he is BIG,STRONG,POWERFULL and LOVING!!!
With God in my life i will always be safe!!! i amy die for the cause of Christ but how can i not be safe within the arms of the creator?
*may
Yeah Jake, but when we cry out to God, he defends us by His grace, not because we've been good.
Remember, the righteous shall live by faith (not works)
:)
Ross, you said
"YOU coose where you put yourself and you also choose what risks you expose yourself to."
We need to remember that not everyone has free and unhampered choice in their life. The greater majority of us are often in a position where there are no black and white options.
I think what you're actually getting at, is more about respect and honour. i.e. that, because God loves us unconditionally, we should respect ourselves and each other as chosen and God-breathed creations. To honour God with both our hearts, minds and bodies is vital in our relationship with Him.
We may not always have the choice to be in a safe situation, but if we trust God and try our best to live that out, then He is honoured.
I, too, have someone very close to me suffer sexual abuse and I always get nervous of what may be said unfeelingly in these discussions.
If the topic of your blog is about our actions matching our spirit and mind, then keep it about that. There is no reason to create panic.
Telling us that, by living lives that do not match where God wants us to be, puts us in danger? That's not cool. And I believe it’s not true.
God is with us always no matter what choices we make. Coming into relationship with Him will not keep us out of danger. For some people, it may mean that they are in more 'danger' than before.
Also, you said
“I expected this subject would cause question - that's the purpose for these blogs...”
That is no an excuse for splashing massive issues half-heartedly on a webpage. We can’t just say “oh well, it was supposed to generate discussion.” Sensitivity is vital and if you are going to discuss such a sensitive topic, it should be biblically-based and well-researched. I don’t think this was either.
That brings me to my final point - SIN DOES NOT EQUAL DANGER OR ABUSE. People are not sexually abused because they have sin in their lives. Neither will the chance of abuse decrease if people live Holy lives. To say so, is to believe that life will be rosy if we be ‘good Christians’.
For me, I love God and know He is there for me in every moment of my life - good or bad. I know He wants the best for me, but I also know that I live in a damaged and imperfect world. What counts most is who I am, not what is done to me.
Melanie Cotton, i never mentioned that it was by works or being good, you know i know that we dont need to do nething to recieve Gods grace. my whole little blurb was about being safe in the arms of God ;)
Jarrod...
I thought of an old Scripture in song chorus (yeah, i am getting old now) that says; "He's my rock, he's my fortress, he's my deliverer, in him will I trust". Of course that's straight from Psalm 18:2 - Jake Clanfield also made mention of it in his reply.
I also thought of a strange verse in James 1:2 & 3. It says - "consider it pure joy my brothers when you face trials of many kinds..." I know, odd, but it goes on to say - "because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance." Now I truly believe that the early first century church that faced imprisionmnet and death faced this daily. I also believe that still today followers of Jesus face persecution too. I know first hand what persecution feels like as I worked for God for years in inner Sydney at Kings Cross and faced ridicule constantly at uni for my new found faith when I made the decission to follow Jesus at 18 years of age...
I also really questioned God when a married couple who had been followers of Jesus most of their lives faced one trial after another - they lost thier son in a car crash, both were extremely ill and the husband almost lost his life too, lost money in an inusrance scheme melt-down and had nothing to retire on, but you know their faith was unchallenged.
James 1:4 & 5 goes on to say - "Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks widom he should ask God who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." I think my old married friends had that wisdom so they could face the trials.
I have also observed that sometimes when it is hard, and we are not going to "our rock" and "our fortress" in times of need for "refuge and safety", then we do crumble in our faith and I have seen people walk away from God with comments like - "Why did God let that horrible thing happen to me? He didn't keep me safe."
I can't question the level of their faith (despite what some might read into that comment) but I can ask how secure would I be in my faith were I in a similar situation?
I believe that God gives us solutions to many different difficulties and problems - but I cannot understand myself how we can see those solutions if we are not near to God, or looking in his direction, or "keeping in his will." I cannot believe that a God who loves us wants to see us suffer needlesly - I do believe he strengthens our metal and our faith though through different experiences, relationships and locations.
I thought about Moses and the great exodus from Egypt... now there was a man of faith that faced trials. In Deuteronomy chapter 8 God wants Moses to follow every command that he was given (the 10 commandments) "so that you may live and increase and may enter and possess the promised land" (Deut. 8:1). He reminds Moses how God humbled him for forty years in the desert and tested him in order to know what was in his heart. Is this what God still does today with our trials? I don't know - I'm on that journey too.
I don't know if that answers any questions or poses more?
A really tragic thing happened to my best friend whom I grew up with for the last 35 years... we buried him a year and a half ago after loosing his very short fight with cancer. He left a wife, two young boys under the age of four, a succesful business and a lovely home.
But you know, all through his fight he never questioned God, instead he continued to honour and worship God and make sure people were around to continue to teach his boys about Jesus. His wife was only new to faith, but instead of shrinking away from God and getting angry she grew closer to God and has said herself that she found safety in God, even now after her husband's gone. That security is hard to explain, but I have seen it in mature Christians lives as they have lived through the hard times and had their faith tested and have been humbled and now they consider it joy because their relationship with God is all the more stronger.
Even in 1 Peter 3:13 to 17 we read, "Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. Do not fear what thy fear; do not be frightened. But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to anyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behaviour in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil."
I still think that God will show us safety/protection/favour is we continue to follow his will for our lives. Sure - it's no holiday at times I'll grant you all that... but why can't it be if we're changing our world for and with Christ?
A quote I love at the moment is "Just because it is, doesn't mean it should be."
And yes, I am an optimist...
Heid... thank for for the challenge and words...
They have been taken on board...
Thank you...
Hey guys just caught up on this thread, wow alot of challenging thoughts and serious stuff to wrestle with, just thought that I'd contribute something that Jesus says which has been such a revelation to me.
Just to give this context, right before Jesus tells this story, he has said that not everyone who says to Him "Lord Lord" will enter the Kingdom of Heaven cause "He never knew them". Scary stuff! Anyway He then goes onto say ...
The Wise and Foolish Builders (Matthew 7:24-27)
"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash."
Both faced the same storm but with vastly different outcomes. Both heard the words of Jesus and still were not spared from the rain and the wind. What was the only difference between the two builders?
When you read it carefully it says that one heard the words of Jesus and practiced them, did it, applied them to his life and that was the rock that saved him in the storm.
The other heard the words of Jesus but did not practice them, did not apply them to his life, did not make them the foundation and that is like building on sand.
One fell, one stood, both faced storms.
I thank Jesus that whilst there is no promise that we will be spared from the storms of life, there is the promise all throughout scripture (OT & NT) that if we live in HJesus and make Him the core/founding principle of our lives then we will be able to withstand anything that life throws at us.
John 16:33 (New International Version)
"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."