Avoiding family conflict at Christmas
What are some helpful strategies to ensure that Christmas is a time of rejoicing and celebration rather than one of conflict and chaos? Staff from The Salvation Army Counselling Service have offered advice to help prevent family arguments during the festive season.
- Seek to understand more about how your family works. Once you understand more about it (and the part that you play in it) it will be easier for you to objective about it. Emotional reactivity is not helpful.
- Remember there are some things that, in the bigger scheme of things, are not worth making an issue of.
- Avoid digging up the past.
- Christmas may not be the best time to confront or expose problems. There may be better times and better ways to do that.
- Be assertive about what you need, but not aggressive. Being assertive means that you can say what you need, think, feel and want, in a way that is respectful of the other person. Being assertive also means that you exercise choice over what you say and what you don't say.
- Plan what is going to happen over the Christmas period and make sure you feel ok about what is happening. If you feel you have been dragged along with something that you really don't want to be a part of, you are more likely to be resentful.
- Christmas is a time to look for the best in your family and friends. Look and speak to the very best in them.
- Laugh, dance, get lots of hugs, give lots of hugs and go to church. That way you won't lose your perspective of what Christmas is really all about.
The Salvation Army Counselling Service is open to everyone and offers professional counselling for personal issues as well as marriage and family relationships. To make an appointment, click here and call the centre nearest to you.